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Professional matchmaker told what kind of women wealthy men are looking for

The New Year’s holidays have died down, from which they always expect some kind of magic. And surely under the chimes, many made their deepest desire – to find their soul mate. Millions of lonely people have been unable to meet her for years. And what happiness can there be without love?

In recent years, residents of large cities are increasingly turning to the marriage industry for help in finding a life partner – Internet sites, dating services, matchmakers. Who are modern men and women looking for, why it is easier for pensioners to meet their love than for young people, and what a born matchmaker should be, we found out from the famous metropolitan matchmaker Elena.

– Elena, how did it happen that you became a professional matchmaker?

– I discovered my vocation in a medical university, where I worked for a long time. I liked helping people, “pimping,” as they say. She began by introducing her single girlfriends and classmates. It turned out that I immediately saw which couples fit together. The desire to continue doing what I love and led me to the marriage industry. It is a great happiness for me to help single people find their happiness.

– What part of dating through a marriage agency ends with long-term relationships or marriages? How often do failures occur when a person cannot find a match at all?

– About 15% of people never find their soul mate. Most often this happens due to the overstated requirements of a person to a future partner. I try to work with people, convince them to moderate their demands, to look at things objectively, but this does not always work. It happens, however, that people leave and come back after a few months or years already changed, wiser and more flexible.

– What are they, modern brides and grooms? What has changed in marriage tendencies in your ten years of work?

– If we talk about the age range, then it is, of course, different. The database contains profiles of young people from 21 years old, elderly grooms and brides who have not lost faith in love. The main stream of clients is women. The most popular age for our clients is 30–35 years old. Women have also become more emancipated, independent. If ten years ago a man was looking for a younger wife, now the weaker sex also “sins” with this. Men who turn to our agency are looking for an extremely serious relationship. We can say that over the past five to ten years, marriages have “aged”. Now young people are in a hurry to make a career, travel a lot, and they begin to think about the family just after 35 years. But in general, the number of male profiles has increased in recent years. Some grooms are tired of searching through social networks where girls are trying to get a jackpot. Also, divorced men who already know how good it is to have a quiet family haven are often addressed. They are just looking for women to match themselves.

– When meeting on the Internet, people often run into swindlers or perverts. How do you screen out such candidates?

– I personally talk with each candidate, I immediately see scammers and gigolos. Naturally, I check my passport and other information through the security service. But it is very rare to refuse services: as a rule, people who go to a marriage agency and pay money come to us with serious intentions. Scammers are more likely to trade in virtual reality, so finding a husband on the Internet is becoming more and more difficult.

“Good men are dismantled with” puppies “

– What kind of men do modern women dream about? Conversely, who do men want to find?

– Young attractive girls are looking for wealthy men. They set a framework – income, for example, from 300 thousand, no less. More mature ladies are already focused on common interests, and wealth comes as a pleasant bonus. The ideal option is a man with a core, kind and responsible. And then, of course, problems begin, because in recent years there are fewer and fewer truly strong men who are ready to take responsibility. Girls take such people apart literally as “puppies”, and then you can only get to know them in case of divorce, when they are about 40–45 years old. The demands of men are also natural. They want to see a beautiful, intelligent, interesting companion next to them. Of course, the first thing a potential groom looks at is a photo. The first impression is that you can’t get away from it. But after the first date, the similarity of characters, spirituality, so to speak, is already noticeable. And appearance gradually fades into the background. As for wealthy men, they are less and less looking for models with silicone breasts and lips. They need smart girls, domestic, loving children. Very often, by the way, wealthy clients ask not to advertise their condition in front of the candidates, they are tired that everyone around them is interested in their wallet. At the same time, they are ready to fully support the future darling and even help her close relatives, but first she must choose them for other qualities, with her heart. In general, a woman who is ready to start a family, easy-going and kind, will definitely find her betrothed. The rest is details. And any woman has a chance to meet a suitable partner, we do not refuse to help anyone. True, sometimes it happens quickly, and sometimes it takes years. It’s just that after 35 years, the bar should go down, because there are fewer and fewer free good men at this age. That is, the fewer requirements a woman makes for a potential life partner, the more chances of finding him. Although many modern women after 35 look even better than young ones.

– In general, grooms and brides often show clearly exaggerated demands on their halves? What are they?

– Excessive requirements are encountered, because of them, the search for a life partner is in many ways delayed. For women, this is a request for a well-to-do man, preferably without children, alimony and loans. Imagine such a beauty writes 50 points that a man should. Few people will pass such a casting. Sometimes they call and demand an oligarch. It’s funny. We have, of course, wealthy suitors, but Abramovich, alas, did not leave a questionnaire. Well, men are not far behind. They ask, for example, a photo in a swimsuit. The main thing is appearance and figure. And also to make good money without children. In general, there was a case when “while unemployed” wanted to find at least the daughter of an oligarch. In general, people in our time are very disunited, and often without the help of the same matchmaker, they simply cannot build relationships even with familiar people. Once a lady of old age turned to me. We posted her profile and even found an overseas prince. It seems like a fairy tale about Cinderella, but it turned out that they knew the “prince”! How can you not believe in fate? Now the “newlyweds” live happily in France. Once again, a man and a woman came to me, whom they had already tried to introduce in another agency, but they did not like each other. After talking with each of them, I realized that they are just a great couple in all respects. It took a long time to persuade them to go on a date again, they went there, it seems, only out of respect for me. But it worked, now they are together and happy. In general, a lot of interesting things happened in ten years. There were cases when a potential groom described the desired image of a client, and I understood that we have a woman who fits one hundred percent into his ideal.

– In the film “A hostel is provided for the lonely” the heroine of Natalia Gundareva not only introduced people, but also constantly solved their family problems. Don’t your clients come to you with this?

– And how! Not without it. It is important not only to introduce people, but also to help them build relationships, and this does not always happen easily and easily. Very often, when our clients already start living together, women come to us to complain about their partner. For example, they complain that a man is not well-groomed, does not take care of himself, does not dress well, I explain to them that it is now their concern to look after the appearance of a loved one. Still very often they come with complaints about the mother-in-law, there are times when I have to act as a conciliator in violent quarrels. Once I introduced two clients: he is 43, she is 37 years old, everything seems to be working out for them, we went to rest together. After a while, first a woman called with the words: this is such a cretin! And then a man showed up and also swore at what the light was about his girlfriend: this is such a hysterical woman, do not introduce her to anyone, have mercy on the men! Well, what can you do, I began to look for a new pair for each of them. But somehow neither one nor the other did not succeed. At the same time, I really understood that these women and men are very suitable for each other. I began to persuade them to try again, and it worked, now their child is already three years old.

“I wish God would let me live longer”

– Do pensioners turn to you for help? Is it harder for them to find a mate than young ones?

– Yes, pensioners come quite often, among the elderly there are most of all lonely, unnecessary people. Children and grandchildren grow up, they have their own lives, and there is practically no time to communicate with their parents. Some grandmothers and grandfathers, tired of loneliness, come to us, although it is very difficult for them, they are ashamed to look for a partner at this age, and even through a matchmaker. Once a 76-year-old woman came to our agency, very smart and intelligent. This woman buried her husband and daughter, we talked with her for an hour and a half, probably, and both cried, her life was so hard. Very soon we sent her on a date with one wonderful grandfather. After the meeting, the woman immediately said that if the gentleman chooses her, then she needs nothing better. Now the “young” have moved in and live together. They just shine with happiness and say all the time: if only God would let them live longer now. In general, it is, of course, easier to find a couple for older people than for young people, they do not have such exaggerated requirements, they are most often not interested in the material side of the issue.

– Does it happen that parents of adult unmarried children come to you for help?

– Yes, quite often, both mothers and even grandmothers come for advice on how to persuade children or grandchildren to seek help. Relatives of unmarried girls after 28-30 years of age are especially worried: after all, they may no longer have time to have children. In fact, in such big cities as Moscow, getting to know someone is a whole problem. If you have not found yourself a mate in college or among friends, it is difficult to find a partner.

– What qualities should a good matchmaker have?

– Intuition is the main weapon of a good matchmaker. The ability to understand people well, notice the subtleties, build a logical chain, see suitable pairs like pieces of a puzzle. During the interview, I look into the soul. Having evaluated the client’s inner world, it is much easier to find a person with similar views and temperament. And it is also very important to truly sincerely love people, those around you feel it and begin to trust you.

– How often do clients ask about your marital status, is it important for people that the matchmaker is married? How does your husband feel about your job?

– Clients are all interested. And that’s okay. It would be strange to come to a doctor who does not know how to heal. I am married, and my husband fully supports me in all my endeavors. And the confirmation of our happy family was two children. Of course, now they are adults, but for us all the same children.

The head of the pre-trial detention center, where Efremov is sitting, was sent to the women prisoners

Global personnel reshuffles have taken place in the capital’s pre-trial detention centers. Three famous Moscow “prisons” (as they are called by the people, although formally it is wrong) changed their bosses.

Personnel rotation has taken place in the leadership of the capital pre-trial detention centers

As it became known to “MK”, ​​the owner of the legendary “Butyrka” Sergey Telyatnikov has been retired. He headed SIZO # 2 for ten years, which is a lot for the FSIN system. Rumor has it that one of the reasons for the departure of the 56-year-old head of the detention center was the scandal associated with cells for life-sentenced prisoners. It held especially dangerous criminals, sentenced to capital punishment, during their stay in Moscow (for example, when considering a complaint in the Supreme Court). However, sometimes prisoners were placed in such cells for psychological treatment, from whom obedience and humility were required.

The head of Butyrka will now be the former head of the women’s detention center # 6, Andrei Shubin. He is known for bringing near-perfect order to a once not-so-good isolation ward. Thanks to Shubin’s “iron hand”, it became possible to open a building there for the detention of arrested crime bosses. Well, for the fair sex will be supervised by the ex-head of SIZO No. 5 Evgeny Dobrov. Now in this isolation ward, we recall, after the verdict, the actor Mikhail Efremov.

The gynecologist assessed the statistics on abortions: “We need to deal with women”

The Ministry of Health cited data according to which most abortions are performed in the Jewish Autonomous Region (35.6 abortions per 1000 women of childbearing age), in the Republic of Tyva (34.5) and in the Sakhalin Region (32.2). Least of all such medical operations are performed in Ingushetia (6.2), Dagestan (7.0) and Moscow (8.5). The international expert in the field of reproductive health is confident: it is necessary to reduce not the number of abortions, but the number of unwanted pregnancies, that is, to increase the literacy of the population in matters of contraception.

Most abortions are performed in the Jewish Autonomous Region and Tuva

General Director of the Association “Population and Development”, obstetrician-gynecologist, international expert in the field of reproductive health and rights Lyubov Erofeeva explained that our country is not at all the leader in the number of abortions in comparison with other countries. The average figure in Europe is 25 abortions per 1000 women of childbearing age, while in Russia this figure is not much higher – 27-28. It turns out that in three Russian regions – the Jewish Autonomous Oblast, the Republic of Tyva and Sakhalin, the number of abortions significantly exceeds the average European statistics, this is a rather large figure.

The gynecologist explains the low number of abortions in Ingushetia and Dagestan not by the widespread use of contraceptives by women in these republics, but by the high birth rate:

– They traditionally have large families, and even if the husband leaves the family, the mother is not left alone: ​​these peoples have developed teip (clan, tribe), support, mutual assistance, and there are practically no children left without care, if necessary, they are taken by relatives … Therefore, women do not have abortions, but give birth to many children, says Lyubov Erofeeva.

The expert does not consider the situation with the number of abortions in Russia to be such a colossal problem, given international statistics, but the problem with the prevention of abortions, with teaching teenagers in sexual literacy in our country, in her opinion, is really serious.

– This is a very politicized area, and I would not treat the indicators of the number of abortions so unequivocally. The Ministry of Health takes into account the statistics of abortions performed in state institutions, and those made in commercial medical structures are not included in the statistics of the Ministry of Health, they are included in the figures of the Federal State Statistics Service. I think it’s not about the numbers. The state should fight not abortion, but unwanted pregnancy! If we do not teach teenagers how to avoid unwanted pregnancies, then the number of abortions in our country will grow.

If an unplanned pregnancy has already happened, then the woman has the right to an abortion, the gynecologist is convinced:

– What then will happen to the child (it is no coincidence that the cases of “foundlings” have become more frequent recently), what will happen to the mother? After all, a woman is not a maternity apparatus, she is not obliged to produce children by conveyor belt method. It is necessary to take into account family circumstances, and material conditions, and the health of a woman, finally. The embryo is not yet a human being, we need to deal with women. You can’t poke your nose into a woman’s personal life! But it comes to the point that in some regions they have created a “runner” in antenatal clinics – until the pregnant woman talks to the priest, does not collect the necessary signatures, she will not be signed up for an abortion, to which she is legally entitled. Although there are about 5% of women who come to the doctor and express doubts whether to leave their child or not, despite the fact that they have a generally good life situation, we can expect from them that they will change their minds and keep the pregnancy.

At the same time, the gynecologist stressed that the ban on abortion has never helped to increase the birth rate in the country:

– In Malta, in Poland, abortion is prohibited at the state level, and this did not lead to any good results. The birth rate has not increased. In Poland, women are brought to disability, but pregnancy is not terminated! If you look at the birth rate statistics, then in Poland, where abortion is prohibited, the birth rate is lower than in Russia, where it is allowed (let me remind you that it is allowed up to 12 weeks).

The difference in the manifestation of diseases in men and women is described

Already a century ago, doctors noticed that women live on average longer than men – and this trend is observed in almost all countries developed enough to create a health care system. Among the reasons for the gap in life expectancy are more frequent and earlier visits of women to doctors, a greater tendency of men to socially dangerous behavior and the use of alcohol, nicotine, drugs. And there are also many diseases that much more often affect the strong, but, alas, not in the medical sense, gender.

The stronger sex is more likely to suffer from the heart and kidneys

Heart, kidneys, Parkinson

According to statistics, in different countries, men often die at a younger age and are more likely to suffer from chronic diseases than women. Let’s immediately exclude those diseases that arise due to gender differences (for example, prostatitis or polycystic ovary disease) and turn to diagnoses that do not have gender differences.

Men are more likely than women to have heart disease. In addition to the love of strong drinks and tobacco, this is the result of the tendency of the male body to accumulate visceral fat – that which is formed around the vital organs in the abdominal cavity. Normally, it protects these organs from damage, warms them, acts as a reserve source of nutrition, but with an excess, such fat turns into one of the factors that increase the risk of developing heart disease.

The second factor that increases the risk of heart attack and other diseases of the cardiovascular system is the lower production of estrogen in men than in women, and, alas, nothing can be done about this. Estrogen controls cholesterol levels, reducing one of the key risks of heart disease.

Kidneys are also ready to present an unpleasant surprise to men: they form calculi (stones) much more often, and due to the peculiarities of the male genitourinary system, the exit of even a small stone turns into a real hell. But in women, large stones of a complex structure are more often formed, which must be removed surgically.

It’s not just the kidneys and heart that give men more trouble. The stronger sex also has a higher risk of developing Parkinson’s disease, a slowly progressive neurodegenerative disease, in which dopamine-producing neurons die. Studies have already emerged indicating a link between this disease and the Y chromosome, which only men have. In addition, all the same estrogen helps women maintain a healthy nervous system – and men are deprived of such insurance.

Hernias, aneurysms and coronavirus

As doctors note, men have almost 10 times higher risk of developing inguinal hernias than women, 5 times higher risk of aortic aneurysm and 4 times higher risk of gouty arthritis, which occurs due to deposition of urate crystals in the tissues of the body due to the accumulation of urinary acid and reduce its excretion by the kidneys. With gout, nodes – tophuses are formed, and the kidneys are affected. And also men are more likely to suffer from pancreatitis, bladder cancer, duodenal ulcer and alcoholism, which in itself is a provoking factor for many diseases.

Even the new coronavirus, COVID-19, is far more severe on men than on women. It affects men more strongly and more actively, who tolerate it more heavily than women. The risk of death in men is also higher. One of the reasons is that men are more likely to dismiss the initial symptoms of the disease and, having swallowed a couple of antipyretic pills at best, run to work (where they actively and effectively infect colleagues and clients). They end up with a doctor when the virus causes severe symptoms. These data were obtained by doctors from the USA, China, Italy and other countries.

The second reason is that women have a stronger and more stable immune response. On the one hand, this is not very good, because autoimmune diseases are more common in women. But on the other hand, women are better protected from new viruses and microbes. Their immune system produces a stronger initial immune response.

However, do not rush to rejoice, beautiful ladies: women, according to all the same statistics, are more likely to suffer from strokes and multiple sclerosis, tk. age-related fluctuations in estrogen levels provoke blood clots, osteoporosis during menopause, Alzheimer’s disease, urinary tract problems and thyroid disease. Diseases in women are delayed, because at first they are protected by estrogen, the level of which decreases during menopause, which is why women overtake all these diseases. In a word, regardless of gender, the best tactic is prevention.

And in order to detect the disease at an early stage, you need to undergo regular medical examinations – or at least visit a therapist who will write out directions for tests. They can be handed over separately, but now there is a more economical option, both in time and money – comprehensive annual inspections.

“Check-ups (check-up) are a set of laboratory tests, compiled taking into account gender, age, additional risks – smoking, malnutrition, insufficient physical activity. When choosing a check-up, you need to focus on whether there are close relatives with serious diseases at an early age, high blood pressure, etc. The more of these risk factors, the more often a check-up is needed. Its composition also depends on the condition and associated risk factors – not everyone needs an ultrasound scan twice a year or a complete analysis of all sex hormones. You need to choose a complex according to your state of health and well-being, “said the head of the medical laboratory Valery Savanovich to MK.

As Valery Savanovich notes, the complexes of laboratory tests are used for the early detection of heart disease, diabetes, infections, cancer, etc. Having received a transcript of the research results, a man or woman will immediately understand, you can still breathe a sigh of relief, or it is time to make an appointment with doctors and put off medicines.