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Experts told that you can learn about parents from the drawings of the child

“My son never draws in pictures, where he depicts our family, the younger sister, as if she does not exist,” the mother of a 5-year-old child worries. “My daughter always paints herself separately from my husband and I,” the parents of the first grader complain.

Of course, it is impossible to fully understand the problems of the child and his attitude towards the family only by his art. However, experts are sure that many of the “pain points” of the baby can be easily identified by what and how he draws.

What can the drawings tell about the child, his emotional state and attitude towards loved ones? We tried to figure it out with a child psychologist.

How to interpret what your kids are portraying

Unfortunately, sometimes attentive parents are sure that the child feels comfortable in the family, even if this is not entirely true, – explains the child psychologist Yulia Krotova. – An ordinary child’s drawing can tell adults a lot about the baby’s condition even without going to a specialist. Understanding will help adults smooth out the negative and create a comfortable environment for the child. Of course, there is practically no point in evaluating the drawings of babies under three years old, they do not objectively reflect the child’s inner state and his relationship to adults. Children’s creativity becomes really informative from 4-5 years old. Also, you should not evaluate a picture of a child if it is drawn immediately after some kind of family conflict or quarrel. Obviously, the drawing will show only the child’s attitude to the current situation, and not his state and perception of his family as a whole.

Experts believe that one of the most effective ways to diagnose intra-family relationships is the “My Family” drawing test. With a correct assessment, you can get the most complete information from it. To conduct the test, you just need to ask the child to draw his family the way he wants.

Photo: ru.wikipedia.org

Black dad and lonely kid

A case from one’s life: Alina from the Moscow Region noticed that her eldest 5-year-old son became very capricious and withdrawn after the birth of her younger sister. The My Family drawing showed unexpected results. The kid depicted himself on the left side of the sheet next to the grandmother and the cat. Mom and her sister were on the other side of the sheet, and dad was drawn in the middle of the composition and carefully shaded in black, the rest of the family were painted in bright colors.

Psychologist’s comment: In the drawing of his son, Alina was most excited by the fact that the boy depicted his father in black, although in this situation it did not matter much and happened by accident. After talking with the child, it turned out that recently the man most often wore a dark jacket and trousers, which is why the son painted it with a black pencil. In such a picture, you can talk about the reasons for the baby’s anxiety by the composition, that is, by the way the characters are placed in the picture. The child clearly feels deprived of the attention of the parents, unnecessary for them after the birth of a younger sister. Based on the picture, we can say that lately he has developed close relationships only with his grandmother and a cat. Judging by the fact that the boy portrayed his father in the center of the picture, but separately from other family members, the father tries to give everyone equal attention, but is rarely at home, since he works a lot.

How to interpret a drawing by color

Normally, children usually paint bright and colorful pictures of their family. On average, they use 5-6 colors for coloring. Experts note that the more confident the kid is, the brighter his art looks. True, each kid has several especially favorite colors, which will prevail in the picture. However, in general, by the nature of the coloring of the picture, conclusions can be drawn about the current state of the child. So, light, bright or saturated colors speak of cheerfulness and comfortable well-being of the baby in the family. The predominance of red can indicate the emotional tension and irritability of the little artist. If the baby’s family is drawn in black and gray, it is worth thinking about the presence of hidden fears in the child, trying to understand the reasons why he is restless around loved ones. Interestingly, most often the baby paints the same color as himself, the family member for whom he has the greatest sympathy.

Children’s drawing and composition

Normally, the child usually draws his family in the central part of the sheet, the downward shift most often indicates the child’s low self-esteem, and upward – on the contrary, about the overestimated. The only children in the family most often paint themselves in the center of the composition between mom and dad. The family members that the child draws closest to his own image are usually the closest. It is also worth paying attention to the sequence in which the child draws household members: the one who is closer to the beginning, in the eyes of the child, takes a more significant position in the family. If a baby portrays himself aside from loved ones, this most often indicates a feeling of loneliness of the baby, a feeling of his uselessness to loved ones. In addition, such a composition is often chosen by children who experience jealousy and lack of parental attention after the birth of a brother or sister.

The absence of one of the family members in the picture is also considered an alarming sign. If this is the same little brother or sister, then the point is jealousy. If there is no mom or dad in the picture, this may mean that the baby has practically no psychological contact and emotional connection with this person at the moment. For example, if a child did not draw his little brother or sister, perhaps he is jealous of his parents and seeks to defend his right to their love. If there is no “artist” himself in the picture, it is worth considering that the baby feels rejected, unnecessary in the family. If a fictional family member appears in the picture, experts also note that the child is currently experiencing a lack of parental love.

Photo: Children’s Center “Petrushka”

Rake hands and clouds over the nursery

A case from one’s life: Oleg from Moscow began to worry that after starting school, his 7-year-old son began to show incomprehensible aggression and anger, began to obey poorly and even be rude to adults. Recently, the boy’s parents had to work a lot, the child spent most of the time with the nanny, so the adults decided to check if this was the reason for the changes in the child’s behavior. In the drawing, the boy depicted all family members, including the dog, he painted himself last. All the heroes were painted with bright colors, people are holding hands, drawn in a fairly proportional manner. The only thing that can alert the picture is the unnatural rake hands of the smallest author and clouds over the heads of the characters in the drawing.

Psychologist’s comment: Judging by the location of the characters in the picture, at the moment the child does not feel deprived of attention in the family. The only thing, not very good, is that he portrayed himself as the last one, this suggests that the boy subconsciously does not feel significant in the family. But the author’s unnatural rake hands can really speak of latent anger and aggression in the child. The clouds depicted above the family in the picture also testify to some negative emotions in the baby. In this case, it seems that the boy’s irritation does not come from the family, but from some external factors, possibly from the aggressive behavior of his classmates at school.

The position of the characters and proportions in the drawing:

The comfortable state of the child in the family, as a rule, is evidenced by the fact that all the characters are depicted in the correct proportions relative to reality. If a baby portrays himself as very small, it means that he feels insecure and insecure even in the circle of loved ones. As for the rest of the family and pets, the larger they are shown in the picture, the more role they play for the baby. The pose of the author himself in the picture is also of great importance. A happy and confident child is likely to depict himself with arms and legs outstretched, with all limbs drawn in detail according to the artist’s ability. Hands pressed to the body or covering the head indicate the child’s insecurity, perhaps adults too often scold or criticize him.

Drawings in which the author depicts himself as if hanging in the air, and not standing on the same plane with other family members, speak about the child’s negative emotions. Big eyes and brightly drawn pupils of the characters can indicate the anxiety of the baby, as well as the strong, with a clip, shading of the characters in the drawing. And the unnaturally huge rake hands of one of the characters, including the child himself, testify to the hidden anger of their owner.

Details in children’s art:

Psychologists believe that the complete absence of any details in the drawing of the child’s family indicates the isolation of its author. The opposite situation, when there are too many of these details, may indicate a hidden anxiety of the baby. The image of some specific objects in the picture also often indicates that the baby is not well in the family. For example, if, instead of people, a child draws a building where the family lives, then this may be a sign that the child is uncomfortable among those close to him. The image of the sun or a lamp can mean that the author of the picture lacks warmth in relations with loved ones. Clouds and clouds also indicate negative emotions that are bothering the baby at the moment, but they do not necessarily come from family members. The image of various toys or non-existent pets may indicate that the child does not have enough attention from loved ones.

SIGNS OF A WELL-BEING BABY

1. The task to draw a family made the child happy.

2. All family members with whom the baby communicates closely are present in the picture.

3. Heroes are portrayed in proportion, no one looks unnaturally large or small.

4. All family members are close to each other, holding hands. All limbs of the characters are well traced.

5. The drawing is made in rich and bright colors without strong shading.

SIGNS OF HIDDEN PROBLEMS IN A CHILD’S FAMILY

1. The kid does not want to draw his family or draws his house instead of people.

2. Excessively large or small size of individual family members.

3. The kid draws himself as the last member of the household, demonstrating that he means little in his family.

4. In the picture, one of the family members, the child himself, or a non-existent character appears.

5.Picturing yourself or loved ones with a closed face or unnaturally large hands.

6. The predominance of black, gray, brown and purple tones in the picture, the desire to draw your family with only a simple pencil.

CORRECT ANALYSIS OF CHILDREN’S DRAWING. TIPS FOR PARENTS

– For analysis, you should not take drawings that children drew in kindergarten, school or art studio – they are usually performed according to certain criteria;

– If you want to correctly evaluate the colors used in the drawing, offer your child a full set of pencils and paints. Otherwise, the baby can draw a picture in dark colors only because they were at that moment at hand.

– You should not arrange an art test when the child is tired, offended or upset – the result will be uninformative, as it will show the state of the baby at the moment.

– Ask the child to describe his picture on his own, to tell what each of the characters feels, so it will be easier to correctly interpret the child’s art, especially if he is not very good at drawing.

– During the test, try not to praise or criticize the art of your child, otherwise it will be problematic to retest after a while, since the child will act according to a template, trying to please the parent.

Experts told whether it is worth waiting for a new pharmacy crisis

The crisis that developed during the pandemic, on the one hand, gave an impetus to the development of the drug market in the country, on the other hand, exacerbated the problems that existed before it. Experts spoke about this during the round table “COVID-19 as a test of the strength of the country’s drug supply system”, which took place in the Public Chamber of the Russian Federation.

From February 1 in Russia it is planned to restart the marking system

According to the head of the OP Commission for Economic Development and Corporate Social Responsibility Yevgeny Nifantiev, in recent years the drug supply system in the country has demonstrated stability, but today it is under attack, and not even under one. “In fact, the system survived in March when there were interruptions in paracetamol. We must pay tribute to the participants in the pharmaceutical market and regulators, who then worked in a single burst and went through a difficult period. “

However, the problems with medicines began long before the pandemic. The head of the League of Patients, Alexander Saversky, recalled that over the past year, according to data from various sources, from 170 to 270 drugs were excluded from the State Register of Medicines. The situation with prednisone was indicative, which disappeared in April, but the defect (absence in pharmacies) was officially recognized only in October. “The main problem has not been resolved: we do not know the needs of the population for medicines. And we do not need a law on drug circulation, but a law on drug provision, ”the expert said.

Industry representatives noted that the most serious tests for the market this year were a rash pricing system (due to the fact that manufacturers were forced to sell drugs below cost, many left the market) and the introduction of a completely unfinished drug labeling mechanism at the height of the pandemic.

Alexander Martynenko, a representative of the Association of International Pharmaceutical Manufacturers, said that the pandemic has pressed on acute problems. Secretary of the Russian Society of Physicians, Russian pulmonologist Andrei Malyavin urged doctors not to prescribe ineffective and harmful drugs to patients with COVID. “Now a real orgy with polypharmacy: dozens of medications are prescribed to patients. Yesterday I consulted a patient from Omsk, who was prescribed 22 drugs at once. Antibiotic prescriptions are rampant everywhere. This is not pneumonia at all, this is not a bacterial infection – antibiotics should never be prescribed for the purpose of prevention! Today we are already faced with severe complications after treatment with them, for example, with pseudomembranous colitis. Now there is not only free sale, but also distribution of azithromycin and levofloxacin to the population. In the recommendations of the Ministry of Health, we see that it is necessary to prescribe antibiotics to such patients only on the basis of research results, but in reality they are distributed free to everyone. This is not only the formation of superinfections, but also wasted money. The All-Russian Health Organization has unequivocally refused to prescribe hydroxychloroquine to patients with coronavirus, and in our country they continue to poison people, this is a toxic drug. If we talk about antivirals, then there are no direct antiviral drugs against SARS-CoV-2, just like there are none for any other ARVI. We need to calm down and wait patiently for them to appear. Another of our all-Russian fun is the fascination with interferon inducers and interferons. Both poor and excessive immunity pose a threat in COVID-19. All severe manifestations of the disease are associated with excessive immunity, and this situation cannot be spurred on. Pigelated interferons are good for chronic infections, and it makes no sense to bet on them in the treatment of coronavirus infection: their bioavailability does not exceed 3%, ”the expert said.

But there is good news as well. COVID-19 can be effectively treated even now – groups of drugs that have a good effect are known. These are steroid hormones and anticoagulants (direct and indirect action).

Most patients with COVID-19 get sick easily, and they do not need to be treated with anything at all, the expert emphasized. “I hope that reason will prevail, and the Ministry of Health will remove dangerous and ineffective drugs from clinical guidelines for COVID-19,” the doctor said.

In addition, the expert stressed that today the situation with the treatment of patients is greatly complicated by unfair competition. For example, we still massively put heavy patients on mechanical ventilation, while non-invasive ventilation of the lungs gives a much lower mortality rate. “But today we have 800 patients on mechanical ventilation, and only 12 people on non-invasive ventilation, which are mainly used at the Sklifosovsky Institute, Burdenko hospital, First Honey clinic, and there are excellent results. Why this is happening, I do not know, ”said Andrei Malyavin.

Professional matchmaker told what kind of women wealthy men are looking for

The New Year’s holidays have died down, from which they always expect some kind of magic. And surely under the chimes, many made their deepest desire – to find their soul mate. Millions of lonely people have been unable to meet her for years. And what happiness can there be without love?

In recent years, residents of large cities are increasingly turning to the marriage industry for help in finding a life partner – Internet sites, dating services, matchmakers. Who are modern men and women looking for, why it is easier for pensioners to meet their love than for young people, and what a born matchmaker should be, we found out from the famous metropolitan matchmaker Elena.

– Elena, how did it happen that you became a professional matchmaker?

– I discovered my vocation in a medical university, where I worked for a long time. I liked helping people, “pimping,” as they say. She began by introducing her single girlfriends and classmates. It turned out that I immediately saw which couples fit together. The desire to continue doing what I love and led me to the marriage industry. It is a great happiness for me to help single people find their happiness.

– What part of dating through a marriage agency ends with long-term relationships or marriages? How often do failures occur when a person cannot find a match at all?

– About 15% of people never find their soul mate. Most often this happens due to the overstated requirements of a person to a future partner. I try to work with people, convince them to moderate their demands, to look at things objectively, but this does not always work. It happens, however, that people leave and come back after a few months or years already changed, wiser and more flexible.

– What are they, modern brides and grooms? What has changed in marriage tendencies in your ten years of work?

– If we talk about the age range, then it is, of course, different. The database contains profiles of young people from 21 years old, elderly grooms and brides who have not lost faith in love. The main stream of clients is women. The most popular age for our clients is 30–35 years old. Women have also become more emancipated, independent. If ten years ago a man was looking for a younger wife, now the weaker sex also “sins” with this. Men who turn to our agency are looking for an extremely serious relationship. We can say that over the past five to ten years, marriages have “aged”. Now young people are in a hurry to make a career, travel a lot, and they begin to think about the family just after 35 years. But in general, the number of male profiles has increased in recent years. Some grooms are tired of searching through social networks where girls are trying to get a jackpot. Also, divorced men who already know how good it is to have a quiet family haven are often addressed. They are just looking for women to match themselves.

– When meeting on the Internet, people often run into swindlers or perverts. How do you screen out such candidates?

– I personally talk with each candidate, I immediately see scammers and gigolos. Naturally, I check my passport and other information through the security service. But it is very rare to refuse services: as a rule, people who go to a marriage agency and pay money come to us with serious intentions. Scammers are more likely to trade in virtual reality, so finding a husband on the Internet is becoming more and more difficult.

“Good men are dismantled with” puppies “

– What kind of men do modern women dream about? Conversely, who do men want to find?

– Young attractive girls are looking for wealthy men. They set a framework – income, for example, from 300 thousand, no less. More mature ladies are already focused on common interests, and wealth comes as a pleasant bonus. The ideal option is a man with a core, kind and responsible. And then, of course, problems begin, because in recent years there are fewer and fewer truly strong men who are ready to take responsibility. Girls take such people apart literally as “puppies”, and then you can only get to know them in case of divorce, when they are about 40–45 years old. The demands of men are also natural. They want to see a beautiful, intelligent, interesting companion next to them. Of course, the first thing a potential groom looks at is a photo. The first impression is that you can’t get away from it. But after the first date, the similarity of characters, spirituality, so to speak, is already noticeable. And appearance gradually fades into the background. As for wealthy men, they are less and less looking for models with silicone breasts and lips. They need smart girls, domestic, loving children. Very often, by the way, wealthy clients ask not to advertise their condition in front of the candidates, they are tired that everyone around them is interested in their wallet. At the same time, they are ready to fully support the future darling and even help her close relatives, but first she must choose them for other qualities, with her heart. In general, a woman who is ready to start a family, easy-going and kind, will definitely find her betrothed. The rest is details. And any woman has a chance to meet a suitable partner, we do not refuse to help anyone. True, sometimes it happens quickly, and sometimes it takes years. It’s just that after 35 years, the bar should go down, because there are fewer and fewer free good men at this age. That is, the fewer requirements a woman makes for a potential life partner, the more chances of finding him. Although many modern women after 35 look even better than young ones.

– In general, grooms and brides often show clearly exaggerated demands on their halves? What are they?

– Excessive requirements are encountered, because of them, the search for a life partner is in many ways delayed. For women, this is a request for a well-to-do man, preferably without children, alimony and loans. Imagine such a beauty writes 50 points that a man should. Few people will pass such a casting. Sometimes they call and demand an oligarch. It’s funny. We have, of course, wealthy suitors, but Abramovich, alas, did not leave a questionnaire. Well, men are not far behind. They ask, for example, a photo in a swimsuit. The main thing is appearance and figure. And also to make good money without children. In general, there was a case when “while unemployed” wanted to find at least the daughter of an oligarch. In general, people in our time are very disunited, and often without the help of the same matchmaker, they simply cannot build relationships even with familiar people. Once a lady of old age turned to me. We posted her profile and even found an overseas prince. It seems like a fairy tale about Cinderella, but it turned out that they knew the “prince”! How can you not believe in fate? Now the “newlyweds” live happily in France. Once again, a man and a woman came to me, whom they had already tried to introduce in another agency, but they did not like each other. After talking with each of them, I realized that they are just a great couple in all respects. It took a long time to persuade them to go on a date again, they went there, it seems, only out of respect for me. But it worked, now they are together and happy. In general, a lot of interesting things happened in ten years. There were cases when a potential groom described the desired image of a client, and I understood that we have a woman who fits one hundred percent into his ideal.

– In the film “A hostel is provided for the lonely” the heroine of Natalia Gundareva not only introduced people, but also constantly solved their family problems. Don’t your clients come to you with this?

– And how! Not without it. It is important not only to introduce people, but also to help them build relationships, and this does not always happen easily and easily. Very often, when our clients already start living together, women come to us to complain about their partner. For example, they complain that a man is not well-groomed, does not take care of himself, does not dress well, I explain to them that it is now their concern to look after the appearance of a loved one. Still very often they come with complaints about the mother-in-law, there are times when I have to act as a conciliator in violent quarrels. Once I introduced two clients: he is 43, she is 37 years old, everything seems to be working out for them, we went to rest together. After a while, first a woman called with the words: this is such a cretin! And then a man showed up and also swore at what the light was about his girlfriend: this is such a hysterical woman, do not introduce her to anyone, have mercy on the men! Well, what can you do, I began to look for a new pair for each of them. But somehow neither one nor the other did not succeed. At the same time, I really understood that these women and men are very suitable for each other. I began to persuade them to try again, and it worked, now their child is already three years old.

“I wish God would let me live longer”

– Do pensioners turn to you for help? Is it harder for them to find a mate than young ones?

– Yes, pensioners come quite often, among the elderly there are most of all lonely, unnecessary people. Children and grandchildren grow up, they have their own lives, and there is practically no time to communicate with their parents. Some grandmothers and grandfathers, tired of loneliness, come to us, although it is very difficult for them, they are ashamed to look for a partner at this age, and even through a matchmaker. Once a 76-year-old woman came to our agency, very smart and intelligent. This woman buried her husband and daughter, we talked with her for an hour and a half, probably, and both cried, her life was so hard. Very soon we sent her on a date with one wonderful grandfather. After the meeting, the woman immediately said that if the gentleman chooses her, then she needs nothing better. Now the “young” have moved in and live together. They just shine with happiness and say all the time: if only God would let them live longer now. In general, it is, of course, easier to find a couple for older people than for young people, they do not have such exaggerated requirements, they are most often not interested in the material side of the issue.

– Does it happen that parents of adult unmarried children come to you for help?

– Yes, quite often, both mothers and even grandmothers come for advice on how to persuade children or grandchildren to seek help. Relatives of unmarried girls after 28-30 years of age are especially worried: after all, they may no longer have time to have children. In fact, in such big cities as Moscow, getting to know someone is a whole problem. If you have not found yourself a mate in college or among friends, it is difficult to find a partner.

– What qualities should a good matchmaker have?

– Intuition is the main weapon of a good matchmaker. The ability to understand people well, notice the subtleties, build a logical chain, see suitable pairs like pieces of a puzzle. During the interview, I look into the soul. Having evaluated the client’s inner world, it is much easier to find a person with similar views and temperament. And it is also very important to truly sincerely love people, those around you feel it and begin to trust you.

– How often do clients ask about your marital status, is it important for people that the matchmaker is married? How does your husband feel about your job?

– Clients are all interested. And that’s okay. It would be strange to come to a doctor who does not know how to heal. I am married, and my husband fully supports me in all my endeavors. And the confirmation of our happy family was two children. Of course, now they are adults, but for us all the same children.

The husband told about the divorce from Polina Gagarina: “I’ll give a signal”

Singer Polina Gagarina and photographer Dmitry Iskhakov officially divorced in court on December 28.

Star marriage was officially terminated in the metropolitan court

Recall that Gagarina and Iskhakov began dating in 2013. In 2014, the couple secretly got engaged in Paris, and then they signed at the Tverskoy registry office in Moscow. Three years later, daughter Mia was born. The discord in the relationship of the star couple began in early 2020. Then rumors of a breakup leaked to the media. And if the singer did not comment on this information for a long time, then her husband admitted that they really broke up, but managed to maintain friendly relations.

In the judicial precinct №252 of the district Pechatniki Gagarin and Iskhakov were divorced in several sessions. The spouses never appeared in court, entrusting the unpleasant procedure to their lawyers.

Dmitry did not want to comment on the divorce.

“I’ll give a signal when I decide to take such a step,” Iskhakov said.

After the divorce, the daughter remained to live with her mother, while the artist agreed to the girl’s periodic meetings with her father. As for the property, it was rumored that Gagarina would like to keep her jointly acquired property and a car.